I am in the process of thinking, not thinking about what to write but thinking about many things..... you will not believe me if I had to tell what is going through my mind, perhaps you will believe me, my thoughts are normal for once......
I am wondering if I am making the right choices for myself and so on, perhaps investing, well it does not matter where I go, the next step for me is to invest and expand. Investing either time or money or both. I just want to do it where my heart is and where I am happiest.
Wherever I know I am headed the future holds only a solid ground where I cannot just fly away easily, I will just have to see where to manifest and spread my golden roots, its time, I feel it, Its sacry but exciting aswell..... I love a little danger, excitement and a challenge mhwa ha ha ;-D
I have really been amused, Giacomo and I spoke about relationships in Milan. As most wonderful and kind gentlemen have tried to persue me with speach I found it really interesting but not bedazzled at all. ....
....WAIT, I went to go make myself some tea, relaxed for a moment and my mind went down memory lane, hahahahah if you have been reading the blog and if you have been amused hahaha you will love this story....
I was about 5 years old, my brother and myself were playing outside I was trying to climb a tree and my brother was playing with his pallet gun. My brother have this crazy ability that whenever he shoots with a gun into the air it hits a bird, its amazing....
So I was busy climbing the tree, my brother without really paying attention took his pallet gun and just shot into the sky without even looking, PHEWWWWwwwwwww Boooop, there a pigione fell onto the ground, MAMA MIA.......
...Imagine me 5 years old yelling with my tone of voice in shock at my brother telling him to go get the surgical sissors!!!!! My brother did not argue he just did as he was told.
At that moment all that was going through my litte mind was "how to perform an operation on a bird", my brother returned with the surgical sissors and a pair of tweezers, I took it at once and whooops in I went with the sissors and the tweezers tring to find the bullet, oh dear, I felt such a panick, I was tring my best to find the bullet and I was not sure if the bird was alive or just passed out from the pain.... I looked and looked and could not find anything so I turned my head to my brother and told him that I think he killed the bird....
My brother then felt so bad he started to cry but I told him not to worry, all that he must do now is to please dig a hole in the backyard while I prepare the funeral ceremony...
My brother then once again did as he was told, I went to get the bible and a shoe box to place the pigione in it and when I went into the backyard I asked my brother to read the bible, I could not read the big words at that time, so he read the bible afterwards we prayed, we then placed the shoe box with the pigione in it into the ground covered it with ground and we sang bible songs to end the ceremony..... my brother felt better afterwards but I felt terrible for not being albe to save it, ufff I suppose I was 5 years old and performing surgery is not recommended, atleast I tried and over the years with the image of that experience in my mind I realised where I have gone wrong, the fact was that I think the pigione died when he hit the ground, but if I had to perform immediate surgery on a bird again today, I might be albe to save it, well I hope so?....
Yes I was a very strange child, I was a very alone child, always busy with some strange things in my mind, I did not care much about what was going on round me, as long as I had my Cinderella book and my video tape of Beauty and the Beast I was ok, my imagination was big enough to keep me entertained for 20 lifetimes, ohh dear you should have seen me when I wached toy story for the first time, I literally layed awake in bed pretending to sleep peeping through one eyelid to see if my dolls came alive, they never did, ohh I was so dissapointed.
As a child before school my friend was nature and I was always speaking to someone I knew was there but could not see, and I always asked the most impossibile questions about geography.
The one day I went to my mother and asked her where the thunder come from, she told me "Thunder is God being angry at you for being naughty and that He wants to give you a hiding", I was really puzzled because I never did anything wrong, Why would God want to be angry I thought, so the one day the thunder arrived again and I sat on the dining room table yelling back after every thunder strike "NOOOO I was not bad, dont be angry, leave me alone!!!!", I talked to the sea too, I told the waves not to pull me in and when the current did not pull me in I appraised the waves saying "Good Mr Sea" but when the waves pulled me in I got frightened, ran out onto the beach, stood in front of the sea and said with a very dissapointed and serious look on my face "Bad Mr Sea, I asked you nicely not to pull me in." hahahahaha I probably looked strange to the passer by's, hehehehehe, these are only a few memories I have stored in my mind up to the age of 7, uff If I had to write about everything it will never stop, my most valuable memories are the ones spent with my father, I do not have one bad memory of my father, it was only always love, laughter, fun and he was really crazy protective over me, he loved me more than anything else on the planet, he literally would have killed and died for me, he was a very good man and thaught me what true unconditional love was, the most valuable lesson of all, my first nine years of my life was was only happiness, security, stability, laughter, joy, beautiful memories, protection, love and light, more than what most people has had in an entire lifetime.
My deceased father I will love unconditionally, remember and respect untill I have to pass on day. I was truly blessed to have had my father even though it was short, it was priceless.
I am tired and really want to sleep.
Buona Notte!!!!
I will write again soon this time about my adventure again @Ronchi78...